Coffee Crap and Confusion

So today I logged on to this site to see if I'd written anything else in my fairly new blog yet. Then realized that that would be impossible, then realized that it wouldn't given my mind.
So I got up and got me a cup of my coffee, which usually results in what's to be termed coffee magic. Coffee magic, for those hard core coffee drinkers out there already may know, and those others may not, is the feeling quite similar to ass piss that you get when your coffee begins to digest and the caffeine hits your bloodstream then bowels. Turns your lower GI into a blender and forces you running, sometimes holding your asshole closed as tightly as possible, to the can to expell all the coffee you have already drank, leaving behind not only an odd feeling of rejection, but also this caffeine buzz. Hey, at least, like beer, the buzz doesn't go away once the liquid does. I just wish coffee preferred to leave like beer does. Oh well, such is the pangs of existence, non?
Speaking of coffee magic, here comes my personal bout with it for today...
to be continued...